October 12, 2015
Trying to Not Be Sorry
I was on the line with Comcast today, telling that smooth-voiced introductory machine everything she needed to know in order to move me further into the system. She then asked politely if I’d be willing to respond to a brief survey after my Customer Service experience was completed. “Oh, no,” I replied, “I have to leave right after I finish here.” And that quiet, every-helpful voice within me said, “You do realize that you’re apologizing to a machine.” And I was! I was feeling vaguely guilty because I would be inconveniencing the machine and interfering with her schedule .I was hoping she’d cut me some slack and not be mad at me.
Clearly I still have work to do around the issue of faith in myself. I sometimes don’t trust myself to make the choices that will get me through a single day without a meltdowm. And any question of my pitching in to help create the kingdom of heaven? Yeah, let me get back to you on that.
I suspect we all have difficulty seeing ourselves as beings of infinite Light and Love. ‘The kingdom of heaven? Isn’t that something GOD should be doing? I’ve got my hands full already!’ Truly, it seems that the primary challenge of this human experience is not removing defects. We’re good with defects! No, the major challenge is accepting our spiritual Perfection.
And, of course, God is doing it. Or rather, we are doing it as God. I can look back through my life on deep and apparently endless valleys of guilt and shame. Since no one knows the complete contents of that valley but me, I’m the one that has the greatest difficulty realizing that I’m not there any more! Yes, I still have some significant puddles of those negative energies to splash through. And yes, I can be intimidated by an officious machine. But at least I’m no longer feeling guilty for the very air I breathe.
And when we reach the point that machines are hearing confessions, please don’t tell me!
Today I choose to set aside my limited view of myself. Instead I embrace the vision of Spirit, which sees me as a shining, infinite, creative expression of itself.